A month or so back I shamelessly ripped off that episode of The Great British Bake Off where they made gingerbread buildings, and created a competition of my own called
And tonight I cut the ribbon, sound the alarm, release my flying monkeys and announce it is time to get spicy! It’s game time.
Please, please, please don’t let there be just my attempt at a gingerbread structure. Please, please, please don’t force me to trawl the internet for fake entries, copy and paste them to my post and create a fake winner. Please, please, please don’t make me cry inside. And outside. Please, please, please don’t make me drink all the Christmas booze before the competition closing date because of all the above. Because if no one enters this competition then I will fake it. I will. And Father Christmas will cry. As will Buddy the Elf. You’d be responsible for making Buddy the Elf cry. Shame on you.
Don’t be shy and retiring and worry your gingerbread creation will look rubbish. You should see some of the rubbish I have been knocking out. Indeed one attempt did look like a rubbish tip (which, could be an entry idea? *pondering face*. Mash the gingerbread all together in a heap, make a marzipan tramp, fashion some buzzing flies out of currants on a string of spun sugar? I am handing you this competition on a plate! A plate I tell you! A John Lewis china plate!).
If you didn’t catch the original blog, then here is a summary of the ginger plan;
By “My Big Ginger House” I don’t mean a house full of gingers. I may be 3/4′s there in succeeding to have a house full of gingers, but no, I am not swapping my husband for Eric Stoltz (DAMMIT! Why God, why not?!). This is a blog which is 100% inspired/ shamelessly stealing ideas from that episode of The Great British Bake Off - The Gingerbread House episode.
The Great British Bake Off is like some kind of sugary, fatty, calorific feeder type entity, sidling up to you on a boring, drizzly, naff winter night being all sexy and smooth and saying;
“Hey there, you like what you see there, skinny lady? ALL this *floats hands over doughnuts and pies and cakes* could be *whispers* yours….”
My eyes were hungry. With HUNGER. And I got the shakes. What could I make???! I pressed “post” on my tweet of;
“RIGHT. That is IT….I AM ONLY GOING TO GO AND MAKE MY OWN BLOODY GINGERBREAD HOUSE FOR CHRISTMAS”
and within seconds I had a dozen replies from people reacting to my epiphany. My Twitter feed was buzzing with enthusiasm and suggestions, everyone drunk on inspiration (and probably booze) and planning their own! HUZZAH!
“This is AWESOME” I thought, feeling like I was Boudicca and was leading my army of Sweet Treat Lovers in to a kitchen full of spun sugar and golden syrup …
and then moments later…I felt a bit like
“Oh my shhhhhhuuuuuuuugarrrry mice! I will actually have to do this now.”
HOW?! How will I ever make an actual gingerbread home?! I need a plan.
So…here is the plan. I am not going to do a standard square house. And making it sturdy AND taste nice is going to be my major downfall. I could do one or other but not both. I am a “throw it all in and lets hope for the best!” kinda gal. My options…
1) Build a fabulous structure of a Gingerbread Wicker Man. And then set fire to him before anyone has a chance to taste him. I could cover him in brandy like a ginger German version of a Christmas pudding and BOOOOOOOM! I would then graciously accept rounds of applause, whilst going to the cupboard to bring out a £5 box of celebrations.
“Please, please, no stop, you are too kind, please, do help yourself! No, no, I didn’t wrap the individual chocolate delights myself, I cannot take credit.”
2) Or a volcano! All the reject pieces (which, lets face it, will be ALL the gingerbread I have made) could be thrown together in a big pile and covered in red icing. A feature. Christmas on Maui, I would call it. Mmmmmm, enjoy!
But I do have one idea…a fabulous one…one I am hugging to my chest with smugness and glee…one which will blind you with brilliance (*chokes*) in December!
Well. regardless, 2 things I have learnt from practicing making my structure;
1) Just one go, the first shot, the “lets give it a whirl” attempt at this Recipe made a hundred billion gazzilion little ginger creatures. Much like trying other things for the first time *cough*, please do approach with caution and be prepared for numbers you are not prepared for.
2) there is no possible way on this earth to hand wash a rolling pin without it looking rude.
And so at this point I am asking again if anyone else wants to join in? (please). Build your own gingerbread house for the run up to Christmas, email me a photo at email@example.com or if you blog add your blog entry to the linky on the right hand side of my blog, by the 12th of December 2012 and I will post all the photos in a post by Thursday 20th December. The judging will be made by the luffly Gobby McFeck (@GobbyMcFeck) from Twitter. She is as independent a voter as I can get. She loves eating, she hates baking, she is a Twitter friend (ergo I don’t know where she lives so cannot shower her with gifts to ensure I win). There are 2 rules;
1) You cannot use a flat pack ready made kit. It has to be 100% yours.
2) Judging will not just be made on skill, but effort AND originality.
The winner will recieve a little pressie from me and masses of respect from all and sundry.
So, get your game face on. Let’s bake.