Dress To Unimpress

I thought we had at least another 5 years before this problem reared it’s ugly comb-overed head. But no. Smudge’s mid-life crisis arrived this month, and it arrived via Royal Mail. In the form of a leather biker jacket. He ordered it online and had them deliver to our home. He violated … Continue reading

The Fourth Trimester

Somehow I feel like I am being dragged into the school assembly in just my pants and socks whilst the other kids point and laugh at me for being an idiot for believing it is “Wear only your pants and socks to school day!”. But I can’t help it. Yes yes … Continue reading

COLIN WON’T DIE

When the zombies noisily and rudely knock down our doors and eat all the people, ridding the world of healthy flesh and hope, I would put my useless, irrelevant, pointless money on one living being surviving. Colin. The fish. Because HE JUST WON’T DIE. He is a scaly superhero, trapped in a bowl. When … Continue reading

And I went Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiaaaaaaaaaaaaa YA!!

It seems to be awards season in the blogging world. Luckily, me being a 66 year old, balding, fat man who lives in a basement at my mum’s house I don’t need to worry about fake tanning, losing weight and shaving my beard for any red carpet appearances. It’s all … Continue reading